Building trust with your mentee is important, and this isn’t something that happens immediately. Many of the young women we work with struggle to trust adults – they have had experiences of adults abusing and neglecting them, or been taught to be cautious about sharing information with strangers. 

These questions are suggestions for you to use to start your journey from being a stranger to a trusted guide for the young woman you mentor. We suggest that your youth club comes up with your own list for mentors and mentees to use, which adapts to your own circumstances: 

Select a few questions from the list below to ask each other:

  • How would you describe your perfect day?
  • Describe a teacher or coach who has made a big impression on you (either positive or negative).
  • Who is one of the most unforgettable people you have met? Why this person?
  • If there was one person in the world (living or dead) that you could spend a day with, who would this be? Why?
  • Where would you go if you could go anywhere in the world for ten days? What would you do?
  • What would you say if you could go on national television and warn people to avoid three things?
  • Who would you ask if you could invite anyone to join you for a meal? Why?
  • Which TV or movie star do your friends think is amazing, yet you do not share the same feelings? Why is this?
  • Describe your toughest life experience to date. How did you get through it?
  • What did you learn about yourself from the experience?
  • Has anyone bullied you? What made that person so frightening? How did you deal with them or respond to the situation?
  • Much has been written about how much TV or computer time should be allowed daily. If you were a parent, what would you say to your children (who are now your age)?
  • Who in your family or extended family can you turn to for support?
  • What do you see as the main problems or issues facing youth in your community? What can you and your friends, or you and I, do to improve the situation?
  • How easily do you forgive a friend who lets you down? Can you share a recent experience with me?
  • If you could change two things about the way you were raised, what would they be?
  • If you could wake up tomorrow morning having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
  • What is one of your biggest fears of the future? Why?
  • Who is your closest friend today? Why this person? (Maybe there is more than one person).
  • What do you do when you are feeling sad? What cheers you up?
  • What are three qualities you believe make a great friend?
  • Is there any sport or other activity you have yet to try and which you believe you might be good at? Why this choice?
  • How would you respond if someone falsely accused you of cheating?
  • How many hours of sleep do you have every night? Why do you think sleep is important for brain development?
  • When do you feel tired or lack the energy to do something? Let’s consider ways to work through these times positively.

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